Not So Fond o' This Fondue

I was hoping to be able to share with you a wonderful, festive fondue recipe, dense with Gruyere cheese, diced shrimp, white wine, and tarragon.
Alas, what I am able to share with you instead is this glop. Rhymes with flop.
The cheesiness never quite came together with the white wine - apple juice - lemon juice liquidness, save for about 20 seconds mid-cooking, and even then I had to whisk furiously to keep the whole thing from looking like a chemistry experiment gone awry.
As Julia Child liked to chirp, Never Apologize.
So I shan't apologize, but simply direct you, if you have a hankering for a nice, festive dinner of cheese fondue, to try instead this recipe.
Cheers.